Tatostrophe

Mannn...

I swear... I have lived my life in the wrong job. Last month, I was sad because I never got to wear Chanel glasses and wave to my people like Benazir Bhutto. Then (rest her soul) she got killed and I learned quickly that I love my Lenscrafter layaways.

Screw being a blogger; Now, I wish I was a superdelegate. Not because I could rig an election -- but because I could have my ass kissed non-stop for at least two months; wirh full court press; and maybe even get a free pair of Chanel glasses, on the side.

I mean -- have you ever seen anything like this? What would a politician do for a Klondike bar?  Maybe I should say that Jack Abramoff was in the wrong job. He had the right idea, to milk the political machine for what it is worth -- but he represented the wrong lobby.

If I was the Katherine Harris of the democratic superdelegacy, a girl like me would need some wheels from these people who want me to reinvent my state's choice of preferred candidate! Or, how about some rocks   that I could hurl at the poor electorate as they tried to place a vote they thought would count! Gosh -- I'm in the wrong job!

I just spent the last hour typing some rant, or other on this blog -- only to get an ERROR message when I tried to save it. I suppose that, if even the bloghost regurgitates an entry, one should consider stepping away from one's keyboard.... and carrying their happy ass to bed. I'll try again, tomorrow.

Hi.

 I thought I'd begin my electroranting by talking about Chris Hansen. That wasn't the original plan, but a new episode of "TO CATCH A PREDATOR" is on right now.

I don't know where NBC got this guy from, but he is incredible! He has single-handedly made himself the High-Priest of Pedophilic Television!  So many of these episodes have been broadcast until the jackasses who prey on kids are mentioning the broadcast in their explicit emails!

     "I don't wanna get caught on television, k?"

Or... we start to see this exchange:

     "There's something you need to know. I'm Chris Hansen of Dateline NBC"

     "Uh... I know. How you doin'? Am I on? I know I'm gonna get arrested now. Can I give a shout out to my mom?"

Clearly, NBC's decision to bask in the Nielsen glow of dirtbags-on-film has gone way beyond concern for potential victims of child predators. The show has morphed into a kind of twisted, 'SURVIVOR' - type reality show for these nuts. They are even starting to bring their friends for group appearances!

Let's see -- tonight, they are trying to survive in Long Beach. Where might they go next? Are the predators getting their tv arrests on TiVO?  Do you realize that there have been more child predators showcased on NBC than black actors?

There is one show I do have respect for in the 'to-catch-a' genre. It's the one where my man Hansen explores the world of 419 scammers. We like to call it, TO CATCH AN  AFRICAN. Unlike the slaves of the African Diaspora, THESE characters DESERVE to be whipped and chained!  I mean -- it's not so muuch theat they are tearing greedy, desparate and otherwide unsuspecting Americans a new asshole with streams of sacreligious, sewage-laden spam; it's that they are doing it in unwindowed Internet 'cafes', on Commodore 64s!! 

You think for all that keyboard kvetching, they would pave a few of their roads with the spoils of their ill-begotten gains. Hmph! 

~~~